In the first apartment that my wife and I had lived in,
there was a basement within the unit where the tenants could do laundry and also
access extra storage in their own assigned sections. However, during heavy
rains, it was common to find areas of the basement floor covered in a thin
layer of water. Our storage section of the basement was especially susceptible
to the floods that would occur. Perhaps because the amount of water in the
basement wasn’t alarming, our appeals to the apartment complex to address the
issue would not yield any results. Nevertheless, we had to do something to
protect our belongings within the storage section. As a result, we ended up
implementing a strategy where we would place our storage tubs on bricks to
elevate them a few inches off of the ground. While such efforts may have been a
good strategy in theory, the method was anything but sound. Not only did I have
a limited number of bricks, but the bricks that I had in my possession were the
smaller kind of decorative bricks that were often used for patios and
landscaping. So to protect our belongings with the resources we had, I would artfully
balance each tub upon only two smaller-sized decorative bricks. From there, anytime I
would stack another tub or box upon one of the base-level tubs, I first had to test
the weight of the load and then maneuver the storage bins in such a way where a
successful state of balance was achieved within the respective column of bins
and boxes.
It’s amusing to reflect upon this now, for I couldn’t tell
you why I did not secure our belongings in a more proper manner by simply purchasing
a few more bricks for each column of tubs and boxes to rest upon. Perhaps it
was my stubborn attitude that believed that nothing bad would happen and that I
always keep everything in perfect balance. Now as I look back upon this season
of our lives, I can’t help but realize how similar my spiritual journey was to
this feeble method of balancing and maneuvering. At the time that my wife and I
got married, I was shackled by sinful habits that were impeding my ability to
grow more in the Lord. Rather than repenting, I would try to balance both my
sin and my faith, believing that my artfully balanced lifestyle would never be
at risk of falling over and causing damage to the areas of my life that I
highly valued.
But as we get older, life grows more complex, and we end up
needing to juggle more responsibilities and needing to care for more
individuals. If my wife and I would have continued to live in that first
apartment, we would have inevitably acquired more stuff and would have needed
to stack the storage bins higher. And if I continued to use my shaky foundation
of small bricks, it would have only been a matter of time before everything
would have crashed to the ground and gotten damaged by the next batch of water that
would have leaked into the basement. Such a scenario reminds me of James, who says
in his epistle, “after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin,
when it is full-grown, gives birth to death” (1:15). Indeed, whether it is a
slow decay or a sudden event, spiritual and/or physical death is the inevitable
result of leading a sin-soaked life; in hindsight, I believe that this was in
fact the path that I was living on.
If we layer and stack our lives upon a shaky foundation of
faith, the slightest nudge can tip the balance of the storage bins of our lives
and the contents of our heart can become damaged. Is such damage irreparable? It’s
tough to predict the scope of the hurt that we will carry with us. Similar to a
book that absorbs water into some or all of its pages, it will never look or
feel the same again (even after the pages once again become dry). Too, a heart
that is ravaged by sin may be able to forgive and be forgiven, but the scar
tissue remains and the past can come back to disrupt our emotions when we least
expect it. For me and my situation, I gratefully praise God. Even though I will
not be perfect and even though there is some scar tissue, I know that I am
saved and the sins that used to impede my relationship with Him have been given
over to the Lord and He has since declared victory in my life. I share this
with hope and pray that you too may encounter the incredible person of Jesus and continue to develop a close relationship with Him. Grace and peace from our Lord Jesus Christ, amen.
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